Watch Your Mouth

Lunchtime.

Ordering for other people is a sacred trust. 'No onions, extra pickles, hold the mayo' are helpful when written.  At a counter, a husband and father was juggling family preferences by reading text messages to the cashier.  He looked up while the worker confirmed the order.

"You sound like a boss," the customer blurted.  His shock was tied to the baritone emanating from the cashier's petite blonde frame.  Looking up from the phone, his efforts to orient himself made things worse, "What I meant was, you have the body of a cheerleader but the voice of a lumberjack."

Everyone, on both sides of the counter paused.

Co-workers on the cashier's side of the counter took up two positions.  One group communicated, "See? I told you that you sound crazy," through nonverbal queues while the others' body language shouted, "How dare anyone say something like that to you!"

Customers looked away while the awkwardness of paying and awaiting change unfolded in silence.  The customer spoke first.

"I'm sorry.  You caught me by surprise and I said something stupid.  Can we start over?"  Slowly, the gender expression of the cashier began to dawn on the customer.  Perhaps a bit more attention to detail, and less screen time, may have prevented what came next.

"Sure, no problem.  It's fine," grumbled the cashier, while pacing and fidgeting.  Then the cashier walked to the kitchen and whispered into the cook's ear.  While listening, the cook looked at the sorrowful customer, and nodded.  Back came the cashier to help the next customer.

What was the cashier said to the cook remains a mystery, but what the customer found in the food was mucosal. What do you do when someone spits in your food?

Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry...James 1:19

The customer was quick to listen but also quick to speak.  Over his skis he went and wadded saliva proved his reward.  Fortunately, he saw the exchange with the cook, referenced his own fast food work experience and knew something was amiss.

He examined the food, verified his suspicions and spoke to his wife.  The Book of James reminds that listening, speech and anger work together.  Rather than level accusations, they agreed to take all of the uneaten food back to the restaurant and request a full refund.  To slow the anger, she went in while he stayed in the car. 

With permission, the husband and father has shared a few takeaways:

1. Scripture can seem like words on a page until we're in a pinch.  Having James 1:19 in memory, while upset, kept me from doing something stupider.  I hurt the cashier and the cashier tried to hurt me.  Escalation was my right but the Bible saved me from myself.
2. Having a spouse who was willing to listen to my blubbering version of the transaction was key.  She was there to model quick listening, slow speaking and cool headedness.  We believe the same things and, in crisis, family unity served me well.
3. Learning more about LGBTQ+ research was low on my list.  Now I want to know more because of the transaction.  My agreement or support of an agenda is less important than my understanding.  What I don't know can hurt me.