Watch Your Mouth

Lunchtime.

Ordering for other people is a sacred trust. 'No onions, extra pickles, hold the mayo' are helpful when written.  At a counter, a husband and father was juggling family preferences by reading text messages to the cashier.  He looked up while the worker confirmed the order.

"You sound like a boss," the customer blurted.  His shock was tied to the baritone emanating from the cashier's petite blonde frame.  Looking up from the phone, his efforts to orient himself made things worse, "What I meant was, you have the body of a cheerleader but the voice of a lumberjack."

Everyone, on both sides of the counter paused.

Co-workers on the cashier's side of the counter took up two positions.  One group communicated, "See? I told you that you sound crazy," through nonverbal queues while the others' body language shouted, "How dare anyone say something like that to you!"

Customers looked away while the awkwardness of paying and awaiting change unfolded in silence.  The customer spoke first.

"I'm sorry.  You caught me by surprise and I said something stupid.  Can we start over?"  Slowly, the gender expression of the cashier began to dawn on the customer.  Perhaps a bit more attention to detail, and less screen time, may have prevented what came next.

"Sure, no problem.  It's fine," grumbled the cashier, while pacing and fidgeting.  Then the cashier walked to the kitchen and whispered into the cook's ear.  While listening, the cook looked at the sorrowful customer, and nodded.  Back came the cashier to help the next customer.

What was the cashier said to the cook remains a mystery, but what the customer found in the food was mucosal. What do you do when someone spits in your food?

Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry...James 1:19

The customer was quick to listen but also quick to speak.  Over his skis he went and wadded saliva proved his reward.  Fortunately, he saw the exchange with the cook, referenced his own fast food work experience and knew something was amiss.

He examined the food, verified his suspicions and spoke to his wife.  The Book of James reminds that listening, speech and anger work together.  Rather than level accusations, they agreed to take all of the uneaten food back to the restaurant and request a full refund.  To slow the anger, she went in while he stayed in the car. 

With permission, the husband and father has shared a few takeaways:

1. Scripture can seem like words on a page until we're in a pinch.  Having James 1:19 in memory, while upset, kept me from doing something stupider.  I hurt the cashier and the cashier tried to hurt me.  Escalation was my right but the Bible saved me from myself.
2. Having a spouse who was willing to listen to my blubbering version of the transaction was key.  She was there to model quick listening, slow speaking and cool headedness.  We believe the same things and, in crisis, family unity served me well.
3. Learning more about LGBTQ+ research was low on my list.  Now I want to know more because of the transaction.  My agreement or support of an agenda is less important than my understanding.  What I don't know can hurt me.

Next!

A car was being repossessed.

Discovered in the driveway, the plate and vehicle identification number matched.  A flatbed truck backed up, hooked the vehicle and was preparing to lift when the indebted driver appeared to protest.

Things got heated and, with cables still attached, Driver moved the car behind the house.  Thus, if the vehicle was towed, the house would be damaged.  Repo Guy had a body camera and informed the driver of the footage.  To thank Repo Guy, Driver assaulted him, on camera.

When the cops arrived, Driver was in the house with Repo Guys outside.

There was nothing for a chaplain to do but witness the improbable.

Dutifully the officer interviewed each participant.  In the house; in the driveway; watching the footage; verifying the debt; confirming details.

"Cut her loose...not tonight boys," was the authoritative instruction.

Driver, in arrears and with assault footage, remained in possession.  

Some of the 911 calls hang on a little longer than others.  God was at work, certainly, but seeing how remains difficult.  The driver went to bed, still owing after assaulting people who were doing their jobs. 

One, of dozens of dumbfounding, 911 calls is rehearsed because:

1. Prayer partners ask, "How's the work going?"
2. Writing is therapeutic
3. Dumping the call in the reader's lap lightens my load.

Sorry, not sorry.

God is always at work but sometimes God's work, messes with God's workers.  Seeing a single Black woman go to bed, in debt to White folk, having assaulted White men, was stunning.  I asked the White male officer, on the way to the next call, about the decision.

As if reciting a favorite recipe, the officer pulled the case law that drove the decision.  It came down to the difference between a thing and a person.  When Repo Guys decided not to press charges for the assault, re-establishing quiet enjoyment became paramount.  A disruptive repossession disturbed the peace.  The officer acknowledged Repo Guys' right to take the vehicle and advised them to try again on a different day.

We stayed to make sure everyone decoupled without incident.

Next call!

Moving Day

 Moving day draws friends.

Dive team members were moving equipment and needed help.  Boxes, crates and watercraft stirred questions.  "What's this?" I asked.

A folded quilt, made of mesh (think an onion bag) stuck out of the box.  Half a dozen identically unopened boxes awaited the officer's reply.

"That's a body bag, sir.  We go through them like breakfast cereal."  

When rescue efforts involuntarily become recovery operations, finding submerged people is the goal.  Once located, respectful handling of the remains includes:

1. submerging the bag
2. enveloping the person's body
3. closing the bag
4. extracting the person's body.

Divers' body bags are opaque.  Upon extraction, onlookers see nothing except a dripping mesh sleeve.  Recovering dead people, however, requires the officers to see and feel, underwater.

Most of the recoveries happen in muddy rivers and lakes.  Visibility is poor, therefore workers feel their way through silt and murk.  A variety of marine life are drawn to decomposition.  Touching a dead body may trip the reader's recoil reflex.  A police officer, however, has to be able to zero in and stay in contact long enough to bag the body.

 In muddy, murky and cold obscurity officers are going through body bags like breakfast cereal.  People fall off bridges, run off roads and drown.  Falling through ice is common.  

"Can you say more?" I asked.

On moving day, out came an officer's stories.  When well-meaning loved ones, friends and neighbors ask about their work, we're looking for cupcakes.

The officer's stories were mud caked.

Being heard is good medicine and telling an untold story can be therapeutic.  If a rescuer says more, remember to say less.  Ask open-ended questions.  Make as much time as you can for the storyteller.  "If you have the time, I have the time," is sometimes helpful.  

A retiree said, "Getting them talking is difficult, but healing is often found in hearing ourselves." 

Prayer helps.

"Speak Holy Spirit," was my silent prayer next to a storytelling rescuer.  Scripture assures there is a friend who sticks closer than a sibling.  

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. ~ Proverbs 17:17

Any friendliness the diver found in me was the result of Christ's presence in the dive garage.  The Holy Spirit enveloped the moment, zipped my mouth and allowed the professional to be heard.  I listened, as a friend might, because I was empowered by the Mighty Good Friend.

Moving day draws friends.